Suicide

I wanted to blog about this because some people think this is the easy way out. I hate to break it to everyone it's not. I know some of you are say well no duh. The thing that everyone has to understand is people are in danger. Everyone starts listen once the person is dead. Is that right? I think not. My Uncle committed suicide and my family started to listen. The truth is guys, we need to start listening no matter what. You see on the news about someone who committed suicide because of bullies or their family's. You start to listen don't you. Why? Because you knew that person and because you thought that something like this would never happen in the school. We need to listen up and start helping those who are in danger of themselves. I brought this up because their is a lot of suicide going on. You can't say that you have never thought of it. I bet 90% of you have thought about ending you life. I'll admit I thought about it. Why? Because of all the bullies. No started listening tell I came to school with cuts on my arms. So see people need to look for signs before you know it you class mate killed them selves. I want to help with kids who are dealing with suicide. If any of you is dealing with this please e-mail me and I'll talk to you guys. Just think twice before you do it. And also remember
there are people out there who care. 

MY E-MAIL-----> Kelseyisgood@hotmail.com 

How to live through life

Life is hard to live through. Why? Because you have so many challenges to go through.Some people want to go out the easy way or the hard way. The easy that some people choose is suicide but, that is not the answer the answer is to go the hard way and that is to live life tell it is time to go. Yes you can't deal with the pain but, there is ways that you can. I'll tell a little how I was able to deal with life. When I was 12 years old my parents split up. My mother blamed me for it and for the longest time I believed her. She abused me but, I was to scared to call the cops on her. I was depressed because my dad was my hero and I had no one else to go to besides friends. At age 13 I had my first heart break. I was dating the guy for 3 years. Yes it was hard but, I lived through it. The bad part of the break up was I was depressed because of my parents. The only way I thought that would be easy is to try and kill myself. Did it fell good. To me at the time yes. Is it the right thing to do no its not. If  I could go back in time i would of stopped my self from trying it. It's a bad habit to stop but i haven't done since then and I'm 17 years old. A lot of people will have problems in their life, you know what you can fight all of those problems and be the happiest person in life. If you are cutting and you do need help please e-mail me I'll be willing to help you. The one thing i am going to tell you guys is please don't drop out of school or do anything for a boy that the worst thing that you can do. If a boy tells you to do something that you don't want and if you can't don't do they will break up with you. Don't do it if they are going to be like that they aren't the one for you. Yes it will hurt but trust me you can get through it and you will find someone better than them. One thing that you need as advice is don't do anything that you don't want to do. Don't take that advice to hard. For example if you have a job you have to do because it's a job. Another example is school. Yes school is hard and you probably have a lot of drama. Look as drama as a good thing because you can see how society really is and maybe you can fix it. If you are having a tough life then try to live through it. If you can't then a guidance counselor is a good person to talk to.If you have problems with family then I can help big time. I had always had a hard time with my parents and I still do along with my family. I get made fund of sometimes because some of my family members say that i don't have depression and I'm doing it for attention. I'm not but I ignore them. The one thing that you guys can do is talk to them. Don't think that they will let up sometimes they don't. Tell them how you feel that's what I had done and it worked. If you are having trouble in school with bullies then stick up to them. If you show that they get to you then they are going to keep doing it and you don't want that. This is all of the tips that I can give for now if I come up with more I promise to add on to it.

If you have any request on what my new post should be e-mail me----> Kelseyisgood@hotmail.com

18

I turned 18 on December 2nd. I feel different a lot different though. The reason that I am posting this because 18 comes with a lot responsibility . Yes you feel like you can do anything that you can in the world. Hate to break the news to you, but you can't do what ever you want. Realize that you now have to pay taxes, you will be getting more hours at work, and you probably are getting ready for college. You might think well yeah  I don't have to listen to a blog. Yes you don't have to fallow the advice that I am giving. I'm here to help and believe me I have been through a lot. Life isn't easy. It can easily come back and bite you in the but. Life is hard and with 18 it comes with more reason to be even harder. Your parents might be making you pay the cell phone bill along with you own food. The reason that they probably are doing that is so they can show you how it will be. If
you move out on your own you wont have you parents help. You will have to pay bills, food, and gas. The one advice I will give. Try to live with your parents until 20 because you can have a few years to save up on things.I hope this post helps you through life. I also hope that my blog helps you through life also.

When I'm A Parent

When I become a parent I'm going to try and be their friends. I want that special bond with them. When I am a parents I'll give them a little more freedom like my dad did to me. I don't want them out partying 24/7 or anything. I want them to be able to have fun without them worrying that I will find out. I want them to come to me with any problem they have and I will listen. I will be strict like my mother is to me.I would also do a lot of things with them. I don't want us to be sitting at home and they rather be on the computer than be active. The one thing that I will make my kids do is help on the farm or around the house. They are not going to think that thing will handed down to them because nothing will be. I was raised to get a job at 14 and work for things around the house. I had to work for a cell phone. My kids are not going to turn 12 and say I need a cell phone. They are going to work for it and buy one on their own. They would get allowances but they have to work around the house. This world is hard and things wont be handed down to you and I want them to think that. I want to be their best friends but their worst enemy in seconds.

Depression

Hey again guys. I wanted to bring up a topic that most of us can relate to. As you can tell by the heading it's about depression.On November 6th 2013 we had a guest speaker talk to my Family Studies class about depression. She was telling us how she was depressed and the symptoms. She has a blog to about her depression and her recovery. You can find it at the end of this post if you want to go there and read what she had posted. It made me think I used to be depressed for many of reasons. It sucks i know it does. Some people won't even eat, sleep, or wont even want to leave the house. I had a hard time with my depression and I'm still going through it. It's going to be hard for a while because you feel like no one is there to help you even understand what your going through. What I did to help me and you guys can do it it. Get a notebook and write down you are feeling or how your day went, how every you want to do it. The one thing I will tell you about the notebook your writing in is if you don't want any one else to read it then make sure it isn't noticeable. I had one for 2 years and I still have it. My depression wasn't bad as it was a few years ago, then reason for that is I was writing down the things that was happening and  also little goal that I can do to help me be happy. It will be hard at first because some of us would be to depressed that we wont even want to write or anything. You don't have to write in a notebook its just an option to help you guys out. The other thing that you guys can do is talk to someone about it. I have to see a doctor and a professional about my depression. I am on pills and they suck. You mood changes along with your thoughts. Guys always get help when you are thinking about self harm. I used to cut but i stop because of my uncle.I had been in deep depression for 2 and half years now and I really don't know what true happiness is. These pills do work but I'm not telling you guys to go on pills. There are things to prevent them. Talk to friends, listen to music, and write stuff down. if you think friends wont help then go to a school councilor or a regular one. I'm seeing one every Tuesday and after we talk I feel a lot better. I just want all my readers to know I am also here for you guys and I love talking to people. I also loving helping people. That is the main reason I am going to be a Mental Health Specialist.

HERE IS MY E-MAIL IF ANYONE WANTS TO TALK TO ME-----> Kelseyisgood@hotmail.com


Here is Gwens Depression Recovery blog----->www.depressionrecovery-friend.blogspot.com/

Things I am Thankful For

There are many things that I am thankful for. For class we have to do our top ten with ten being the lest thing. Number 10 for me is that I am thankful to have a roof on over my head. The reason that is number 10 is because I  could be thankful for many things that are better than a roof over my head. The ninth things that I am thankful is having a family because they are there for me. I love my family and i wished that some of them didn't have to die. My eighth thing that i am thankful is having a job. Without a  job i would of never learn how to fin for my self when I turn 18 and I live on my own. Have a job helps you learn things like this.My seventh thing that I am thankful for is having a good education. Some people think that it's not a good thing to be thankful for but in a way it is. With out an education you would be seeing people being stupid and not knowing what is right and wrong. We would be talking like cave men. The sixth thing that I am thankful for is having my new brothers. I grew up with all sisters so I never knew how it was to have brothers until my mother got remarried and my sisters got married. They always pick on my and I love it. They would do anything to keep my safe and that's what I always wanted. The fifth thing that I am thankful for is have a vehicle because it gets you so many places. The fourth thing that I am thankful for is having good health. I'm thankful for that is because I don't want to be sick and in a hospital bed. The third thing I am thankful is living on a farm. The reason I am thankful for that is the farm has taught me so much that i would have never learned if i was in the city. The second thing I am thankful for is having parents. With out them I would have never been brought into this world. The finally thing that I am most thankful is having a cow to my very self. The reason for that is it come with so much responsibility  and it's always good to have a friend who wont go off and tell someone else about whats going one.Those are the things that I am thankful for.

I hope everyone has a Happy Thanksgiving and be safe to.

Stress

We all have to deal with stress sometime in our life. Even if you barley get stressed your still going to have something to worry about. It may even be little. For example you might be stressed out because you worked late and you haven't even started on the 5 page or so paper yet or something along the lines. Another thing that EVERYONE stresses about is finding a job. I even stressed about it cause I wanted a car and you have to have a job to pay for it or even a house when we get older. I even have a lot of stress. I stress about the little things that I shouldn't even be stressed about. The major thing that I am stressing about is college. I'm a senior in high school and i graduate in May. I'm stressed because I want to find a good school to go to and a cheap one if I can. Everyone is going to stress about that even if they might not go to college. They are going to stress to what they might do and if they should go to college for it. Ways that I sometimes handle stress is taking a nap sometimes. I also listen to music why I'm doing homework because it helps me think. I also just go with the flows sometimes on different things. I deal with stress by sometimes ignoring the situation. I know that i shouldn't do it, but the thing is sometimes I can't handle it. Life works in weird ways so that's why i go with the flow. Another way you can deal with stress is taking deep breaths or just sitting down and thinking. Ways that I am dealing with my stress of college is visiting some colleges around me and see how they cost.I stress about making friends because in high school you find out who your true friends are. You will trust me and i have only a few true friends, but I am stressed because I want to make new friends also. People will also stress about that also. If your stressed about certain things maybe have a friend there for you to help you. I hope everyone can find a way to deal with stress. If you also need someone to talk to e-mail me, I'm more than happy to help out.

Self-Esteem

 I looked for a blog that was dealing with self-esteem. I have found one that tells me that self-esteem sometimes happens when you are depressed. You're in this state of mind when your depressed. What ever someone says you take it a different way. The reason for that is you have so much emotions happening right now in your body that you don't know how to even cope with all of it.

 Everyone has self-esteem problems. It could be because of bullying, your parents, and society. The reason that I say society because it's hard on you. If you do something wrong you get made fun of, if you doing something right you get mad fun of. You just can't please society. The thing is I'm not telling everyone your going to get made fun of, I'm just telling you life is hard! The blog that I read suggest ways you can make a stronger self-esteem. The first thing that you could do is deal with dysfunctional thinking. Ask your self three questions.

The first one is "What evidence supports my thinking?" The question is asking what is making you think the way that you are right now. For example, your down grading your self. What evidence do you have. Well someone called you fat or ugly. To be honest with everyone, in my opinion everyone is ugly, fat, pretty, skinny, and everything else. I believe that is because we can all be that way no matter what. If you like it or not everyone all all those things. The second question is asking, "Would others say this is true about me?" Ask your friends what do they think about you. If you don't want to talk to friend about then maybe find a family member. Just ask someone to see what they say about you. The finally question that you need to ask you self is. "Does feeling this way make me feel good about myself or bad about myself?”Are the negative thoughts bring you more down are they maybe help you do something. What I mean by that is if people are calling you fat, does it make you want to start eating healthy and work out?

 The next step to having a stronger Self-esteem is journal. Journal what you are feeling. Write down your negative thoughts that you are feeling. Sometimes it helps you out because you can go back to it and figure out how to help other or your self again. The third step is seek positive support. Find books, newspapers, and friends. Read books that say positive things about anyone or look up picture that say that you are unique. The fourth step is create visual cues. " Visual cues provide perspective and help you curb negative self-talk, Serani said. For instance, she suggested leaving positive notes around your house and office and keeping inspiring quotes on your desktop" 

The fifth step is begging a step with a boost. Tell something positive about your self. Tell your self that you are pretty and your skinny. The sixth step is soother yourself. Do something that make you feel good about yourself. The seventh step is discover and pursue your passions. When your depressed write down some stuff that you love to do or stuff that can make you happy. Then go back through the list and do those things. The final step is redefine failure, and keep trying. When your at your low time low and you thing that you are a failure then think of a different way you can thing that. Everyone can be a failure, but failure leads to success. Just keep trying and even reapt  all if these step to help you with you self-esteem. 

This is the blog that I read to get all of these steps and check them out. They post other things also----> http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2013/01/24/8-suggestions-for-strengthening-self-esteem-when-you-have-depression/

Apprecation

It's good to tell someone that you know that you appreciate them. When you tell them thank you or doing something back to them, they feel love by you. I have two people i enjoy helping me and picking on me. I never had brothers when I grew up. I had three sisters an i didn't enjoy it one bit. I now have a brother-in-law and a step brother. I appreciate them a lot because my brother-in-law had helped me a lot. He has helped me work out, since i want to get into shape. He is in he military and he has taught me a lot about their work outs to help me out. I really enjoy him as a brother because he has taught me about relationships. My step brother has helped me a lot because he had taught me to take care of hogs. When I told him that I was showing them for just the money that was when he flipped out on me. I then later figured out that he was right about it's not all about the money. I had learned to hunt to by him and we had made good bets also. I like them because they are brothers that I had never had.My brothers also help me with school when I'm having a hard time. The thing that I love about them is they do so much for me. For example I was herding cattle and I didn't know how to heard them, but when my step brother help I learned how to heard them. They also part of the people that I look up to. They do so much for there family. They also go out of their way to do things for anyone. In my mind i want to grow up and be like them. I want to raise my kids as they raise theirs. I just want to say thank you to them over and over again. Everyone should say thank you to someone that they appreciate because they might not be around for to much longer.
.

Goals

Everyone should have some kind of goal in there life. It can be small or even big. Waking up on time can be a goal, getting to school on time can be another, and doing homework could be one. We all have then little or small. We might not see it as one so maybe that's why it's hard for people to do goals. I have a major one and that is graduating college. The small goals that I'm taking are 1. visiting a college that i wanted to go to. I visited Indian Hills in Ottumwa Iowa. The second step that I'm taking is how much it's going to take for my 6 years. Some colleges only go by 18 months or each term so all i have to do is times it. I also wanted to find a college close to home because I have nieces and I don't want to be far away from them. I also don't want to be far away from my family. The third step i have to look at is what do i need to major in for my job that I'm going to be doing. I had two different people telling  me something different so I have to look more into it. my fourth step is applying there and then my fifth step is doing my work on time and graduating college. Goals again can be anything you guys want it to be even it's small it's still a goal and it helps you work up self-esteem.

Remarried

A lot of people parents get remarried. To me it wasn't a big deal. To other people
it is because that is there mom or dad who is marrying another man or women. You don't know what to call them, you don't know if you should say I love you to them. Now just picture that you were the one who got remarried. What would you do? If I was the one who got remarried I would first off ask them what do they do in there house such as chores, discipline, and family actives. Once they tell me how they do theirs I then would give them idea's on somethings. For example on chores we could have a chore sheet and see who does what like every other week. Say the oldest does dishes  the nest week vacums. On the dicipline I would ask the guy who i married to see what he would want his kids to be punised by. I would tell him how i do discipline and maybe we can work something out. I would tell the kids that they can call me mom, but I'm not there to take there moms place and i can never replace er. If they want to call me mom then hat their chose. I'm not gonna make them do something that they don't want to. I would also think of some actives that we could do as a family to get us closer and so we can learn more about each other.

Eldery moving in

We all love our grandparents. Even if they like pitching out cheeks, but what if they want to move in. If I had one of my grandparents who would want to move in then that might be where would draw the line. I would then put them in a retirement home. If they had to move in there would be some rules and certain things they probably would have to do. The first thing i would do though is see we had room for one more person if not then I would figure out some way for them. If there was room then that would be there room. The conflicts that would happen is the grandma or grandpa would want us to stay home to play with the kids or go every where that we are going. That isn't so bad for the first few time until they do it every single time. The best part of having your grandparents there is you will always have a babysitter even if you were a single parent or married. If i was a single mom and I had one of my grandparents there it would probably help me a lot since that's someone else who can help me financially. They could probably help the kid out with things that I couldn't. In some cases it would be awesome to have your grandparents living with you, but in some ways it would suck.

Single Mother

If I was ever a single mom I would think that it would be hard for me to even cope emotionally. I would probably cry each day because i wouldn't have anyone to hold at night or be there to help me through the hard times about money of some sort. I would be hard me to make it just me but I would try to get a second job to help with all the bills and to raise the child. I would also ask the kid how they fell about there parents being single and how they would feel if they started to date someone who isn't there dad. I would also ask the family who are on my side to help with financially or just help me around the house. Being a single mom would be hard because you don't have that extra support its just you and the kid.

Divorce

Some of us has dealt with a divorce. I always hated my mom of getting one because I'm a daddy's little girl. MY mom divorced my dad a day before mothers day so it made me not want to wish her one at all.
Its hard to deal with even at a young age, but when you are 21 one or so and your parents get one its not as big as of a deal if you were 14. I think when people get a divorce and they still have a kid at home its hard on them because with certain parents you have to decide on witch one to live with or something like that.for my divorce i had to live with my mom and see my dad on the weekends. I didn't get to chose that's what my mom decided to do and i think she had a good lawyer to have the judge to agree on. In some cases on the divorce of where to live sometimes the dad moves out and you stay in the house or the mom moves out and the dad stay there. In other cases they both move out and you live with one of the parents. I hated living with my mom during the weekdays and once every week go to my dads. I hated it. The reason is because I barley got to see my dad and that's who i wanted to be with. Also you hear your parents talk bad about the other and i didn't wanna hear that no one really wanted to. The divorce cost is easy if any adult is reading this. But if I got a divorce I would talk to the guy I'm divorcing. I wouldn't want to the kid to be with one parents on the weekdays then go to the other one for the weekends that not fair or right. I would also ask the kid of who they want to be with. I would have the kids or kid opinion on the things they want so they wont seem left out cause they are in this. I would move out of the house I'm living in with the guy I'm living with. I would find a place that i could afforded with the salary that I make. I would also try to stay int eh same town as the guy that I divorced so hey kid can see him when he wants. With child support I would ask my lawyer what i should do and me and the guy can possible work it out. The most thing that I would do is see what the kid wants cause I don't want them to hate me.

Happy Before

I interviewed a couple witch is my boyfriends dad and his step mom. I asked them what is a stable relationship is and what could be the key to a healthy one to. This couple told me the key is to be honest to each other tell them what you feel and just talk to them about things. Don't be scared to tell them what you want them to. The reason that i chose this couple is I would be at my boyfriends house and I would see how they act to each other. They would say I love you and hug each other. I would also watch as they help each other around the house. I asked his step mom on what she wanted in a relationship and how she could help others she told me that she just wanted honesty and communication. I asked them both what are there advice to other people who are in a relationship.   They looked at me and they told me just keep in touch with each other. Don't assume them of things if you don't know what is going on. They told me to always tell what i feel and don't hold back nothing. If the other person doesn't like it then they aren't right for you. The people who are reading this need to take this advice it will help with a relationship that you are in. 

Happy After

Sometimes couples don't find the right one at first and if you get remarried they might be the one. I asked a couple what is the key to a great relationship You have to be honest with each other. Don't lie saying where your going if you tell the truth to them they might understand. If they don't then they might not even be the one. You don't want someone who is over protective that just turns into a lot of fighting.  The other you have to have and this is the number one also. You have to have communication with everyone. You need to talk one another so they can understand on what we want or need. Girls we all want a guy to read our minds but they can't so we have to tell them. Guys you can't just shrug off on how we feel. If we come to about how we feel and whats going on it means that we trust you and want comfort that our friends can't do. We all want someone to rant to even if its about the simple things that's what relationships can do. We also need to keep each other up by having a healthy relationships. How can we do that? We can have good healthy sex. communication, honesty, trust, physical, and emotional.  Physical can be easy as holding hands or kissing or even by saying you love them. We can't ever go wrong with trying to things for them, but there are times where it isn't okay because they want to do things on there own. We all want to do things on our own. A lot of us 18 year old guys and girls want to do things on our own but you also have to look at the person were dating and tell them how they can do things for us that wont get us mad. Its all about communication in a healthy relationships. I learned this stuff in my family Studies class since we are talking about relationship. Its good to show them how much you appreciate them by doing little things. If handling hands is the way that you show them that you love them then tell them that so they don't feel unloved.


*If you have any question e-mail me at: Kelseyisgood@hotmail.com

Fallow me

The reason that i fallowed Dan the single dad is because it shows that he is doing ok without his wife. I connected with him because my parents are divorced and my dad is like a single dad in a way. He steps up and tries to make me happy and want to come over more. Sorry this is a short blog i promise the next one will be longer.

What I'm going to blog

I'll be posting some of my stories on here that i write or my poems just little stuff about me. I'll be also blogging about my life and others. I will also blog about peoples questions that they have for me. I'll also post things for an assignment for family studies. I'll also be putting my e-mail at the end of every post so you guys can ask question that you don't want people to know about.
HERE'S MY E-MAIL: Kelseyisgood@hotmail.com

Who I am and Why I'm here

This is who I am. I've been living in Centerville Iowa all my life. I'm Kelsey Wagner. I'm 17 years old almost 18 i turn 18 on December 2nd. I have divorced parents. I'm a daddy's girl and i will be forever. I'm creating this blog because of Family Studies and also I want to explain what is going on in my life and what I can do to help yours. I'll help anyone through anything at anytime. I'm a helper not a fighter. I'll post as much as i can and I hope that my blog will help who ever. I'll be posting about relationships and how to deal with certain things within the relationship also along with cheating to. I hope I can help you guys. I also want to be mental therapist  when I get older. I want to help people as much as i can even if there is something seriously wrong. I can also keep things privet when you guys need help with anything. I don't know what else to say for right now but, if anyone needs help feel free to ask or email me. If you e-mail me you question or what i should blog about I'll keep everything quiet and I'll use a different name also. My e-mail is Kelseyisgood@homtial.com. I made this e-mail when i was 11 years old. Please message me if you want to.